American Students' Di Zi Gui (弟子规) appraisal 美国学生的弟子规读后感 #8: Afterword

The day after my students diligently completed the assignment of writing a Di Zi Gui appraisal, I sent this email to them in appreciation of their candid and delightful writings. I also shared my response to the same assignment in reciprocity.

Dear Class,

I read all your appraisals just now. I read quickly, because I was eager to glean your opinions. I will go over them again later and offer my thoughts on your individual reflections, but for now, let me just shout out to you all that I absolutely enjoy and respect your active and critical thinking. My eyes lit up at many extremely interesting observations, comparisons, and personal anecdotes in your reflections. I am very proud of you for being so involved and interactive with this material.

Your reflections inspired me to come up with my own "thesis" for this assignment - truly, I didn't write this beforehand; I'm writing it now as I email you because you have inspired me to do so. The thesis is: The Chinese society bases its social structure primarily on the Confucian values of harmony and morality, while the Western democratic system holds high the principles of individuality and law. While Confucian tradition highly emphasizes harmonious relationships between all people - especially among family members - to maintain social stability, Western democratic tradition believes that individual achievement drives social progress. These different emphases on stability and harmony versus progress and creativity are mirrored closely by modern Chinese and American schools and society. Chinese students engage in more collective activities and practices in and outside school, while American students are encouraged to voice their individual opinions and to be unique so they can stand out. American society is much more tolerant than Chinese society of progressive and creative ideas and behaviors ranging from technical innovation to marijuana regulation. In the meantime, Chinese society is much more caring towards the old, who are usually cared by their children rather than by nurses or senior houses, has stronger bonds among relatives and friends that often function like family members, to name two examples. Although the moral force is strong in China, it lacks the sophisticated legal system of modern democracies. Confucian texts were, therefore, followed more "in spirit" than "in letter."

I imagine that a perfect world looks more or less like a combination of both traditions' strengths: a legal framework that protects individual creativity, and strong social morality that harmonizes inter-personal relationships.

I just want to share these thoughts with you after you have generously shared your thoughts with me. Have a good weekend everyone!

American Students' Di Zi Gui (弟子规) appraisal 美国学生的弟子规读后感 #7

Last but not least!

Appraisal #7: 《弟子规》: Creating Better Citizens of the Future

WMQ, 12th grader

            Confucius’ teachings in 《弟子规》 are so insightful that many of his principles are taught to children in our own culture today.  《弟子规》contains many pages of rules for children, and while the sheer amount of his advice alone seems daunting and questionable, Confucius clearly understands that childhood is the key time for development.  People are most receptive to learning and build the majority of their character traits during childhood.  Therefore instilling these rules into children is a practical and productive way to create ethical and productive human beings and citizens.  Teaching children important morals helps them to live by those principles when they are adults.  Thus while his teachings are aimed at children, his ultimate goal seems to be to create better adults in society. 

Confucius advocates for many morals.  He discusses trust, respecting elders, taking care in activities, speaking well, listening to parents while exercising one’s own discretion, among others.  In “入则孝”, Confucius teaches how to treat one’s parents.  At the same time however, he says “亲有过 谏使更”, which shows that although he believes in respecting one’s parents, Confucius also encourages children to judge situations for themselves and use their own moral capacities.  It is satisfying to see how Confucius recognizes that parents are not always right, and that children must sometimes help them to find the right way.  By encouraging children to recognize when their elders are wrong, Confucius is helping to develop children into individuals capable of judging the morality of situations for themselves.  Furthermore, many of Confucius’ teachings in 《弟子规》 can apply to adults as well as children.  Almost all of “谨”，“信”， and what we have read thus far in “泛爱众” teach practices that people should continue to follow in adulthood.  For example, the right way to conduct oneself when borrowing an item, how to speak well, and how to interact with other people and respond to their words.  Thus although 《弟子规》 is meant for children, Confucius is really building principled adults through this poem.

Confucius particularly values respecting elders and being an internally moral person.  While “孝”refers to how both younger and older people should treat each other, Confucius mostly focuses on how youth should treat their elders.  He spends the majority of “入则孝”and “出则弟discussing how to treat parents and approach elders, with only a few lines discussing how to treat younger people.  Thus he clearly believes that knowing how to treat elders is much more important than knowing how to treat younger companions.  While this part of Confucius’ teachings seems to specifically apply to children, it has effects on adults as well.  Learning how to be respectful of elders when one is young helps them to be respectful to peers when they are older.  Furthermore, these rules of conduct help people to identify their social place, which is an important skill for a citizen in society.  Confucius also especially cares about “道”（to know the right way things should be) and “仁”（virtue, morality).   These principles are woven throughout his poem.  His entire poem is about the right way to behave and what makes a virtuous person.  Confucius teaches to be understanding and respectful of others.  He urges people to care less about money and more about family.  He also encourages people to recognize when words are true and good, and when they are false.  Then he hopes that people act according to the good words and not the bad. 

While reading Confucius it is easy to see the similarities between his teachings and those of Jesus Christ that many American Christians teach to youth today.  Similar to Confucius’ “泛爱众”，Jesus teaches us to love even those people that have wronged us.  Jesus encourages people to be respectful and act kindly towards others, while not showing off, just as Confucius does.  Unlike Confucius, however, Jesus does not focus on how to treat elders.  Therefore while many principles similar to Confucius’ in 《弟子规》are instilled into American youth, often times children are not as aware of how to behave toward elders.  In the culture we inhabit in New York, children often call adults by their first names and do not necessarily go out of their way to treat them more respectfully than they treat others.  That being said however, when I visit my grandparents at their lake house during the summer, children act differently toward adults.  We go to a community pot-luck dinner every Wednesday night where children may only serve themselves after all the adults have.  This rule reminds me of Confucius’ “长者先 幼者后”.  Nevertheless, while Confucius’ rule is out of respect for elders, our dinner rule is based on practicality.  Adults once explained to me that children must go after the adults because the children usually take far more than they can eat, which does not leave very much food for the rest of the pot-luck attendees.  Thus we tend to base our cultural rules on practicality rather than morality.  At other times Confucius’ suggestions are impractical.  In our fast-paced society, people do not have time to stop and bow to elders or walk slowly in their presence.  Again, today we base our customs on practicality rather than respect or morality.  Ultimately, 《弟子规》 provides rules that are aimed at creating better adult citizens and are very similar to the rules we are taught as children today.  That being said, our rules seem to be based on their functionality in a situation rather than respect or morality. 

American Students' Di Zi Gui (弟子规) appraisal 美国学生的弟子规读后感 #6

Appraisal #6: 《弟子规》Reflection
XAL, 11th grader

            For the last few months, I have really enjoyed studying Confucian philosophy in《弟子规》. I think that studying these philosophies provides us, as students of Chinese, with a really valuable window into understanding Chinese culture and its history. Confucian principles are the root of many modern Chinese practices, and are largely reflected in Chinese culture (for example, they are reflected in the Chinese emphasis on elders and ancestors). Studying 《弟子规》also allows us to see how Chinese kids are raised, and thus gives us the opportunity to compare this upbringing to our own upbringing as American children. Comparing the two cultures in this way, while enlightening, allows for the possibility of further highlighting their differences. While I think the vast majority of Confucian teachings in 《弟子规》were, in one way or another, reflected in my American upbringing, there are certainly a few points of contention that I find interesting and worth highlighting:

“居有常 业无变”

           Confucius instructs us to maintain a stable, consistent home and career. My issue with this instruction is that I don’t believe stable and consistent are synonymous. I believe one can (and should) experiment with various careers throughout a lifetime, and try to fulfill multiple passions and aspirations rather than limit yourself to just one. This belief actually played a major role in my upbringing through my mother, who is currently on to her second career and hoping to soon begin a third. My mother has demonstrated the ability to realize many dreams while maintaining stability, and although this may ‘defy’ Confucian teaching, I believe this ability makes her all the more praiseworthy.

“财物轻 怨何生”

             Here, Confucius poses a rhetorical question: if you don’t view things superficially and purely for their monetary value, how can grudges be born? Confucius suggests that grudges are primarily centered around objects and money, and can be avoided by maintaining less superficial values. I disagree with this assessment of grudges; although money definitely can cause a lot of problems, many issues between peers run much deeper than a small conflict over an object, and cannot be easily eliminated. I also think Confucius downplays the difficulty of abandoning superficiality: in such a commercial world, it’s nearly impossible for us to not be at least a little money-oriented. I think the message behind this instruction is a nice and reasonable message, although it is not necessarily accurate and in practice is not always realistic.

            These are just two examples of slight deviations from my own upbringing. Though I do find these points of contention very interesting, I find it even more remarkable that the majority of Confucian teachings actually do mirror my culture. Though there are differences (that vary in significance), our cultures are more similar than I ever realized, especially in the way we are taught to respect our parents, our peers, and ourselves. I am proud to be learning Confucian teachings because I believe I am developing a more comprehensive view of not only Chinese culture, but the link between Chinese culture and my own.

American Students' Di Zi Gui (弟子规) appraisal 美国学生的弟子规读后感 #5

Appraisal #5: 弟子规 reflection
KMM, 11th grader

            弟子规 is an important text. It contains many valuable lessons that one should at least attempt to adhere to – even if that adherence is not completely to the letter. Many of the rules are similar, if not the same in all but name, to rules that are taught to children in America. Obviously, some of the rules are impractical, such as waiting 100 steps after you bow to an elder before you can continue on your way, but rules such as that is mostly an anomaly. Most – if not all – of the rules are well intentioned and should at least be understood.

            The morals of弟子规 are clearly in the right spot, and the lessons it teaches are important. And, on top of that, most of it is practical. Teaching children to respect their elders, be mindful to everyone, and value being a good person over having material wealth are lessons that must be learned and are practical. Even the little things, such as washing your hands – while seeming trivial and obvious – are practical. 弟子规, even though it is thousands of years old, does a fantastic job in having rules that are still, for the most part, practical. There are, of course, impractical rules, but there are only a few. And, except for those few rules, all have an important part in becoming an adult with high morals.

            While弟子规 has a very wide scope and an extreme amount of depth, it is quite different in form any so-called Western “counterparts.” This is because弟子规 is written in short lines of six characters each, with each line having a meaning that has to be unraveled from within the characters. In western literature – at least in that for children – the meaning is almost-always obvious, and there are easily understood sentences. The meanings of the two are quite similar, even, but it is the form that is different. Also, 弟子规 makes the reader figure out what the meaning is, making the experience far more rewarding when a line is actually figured out than it is to just have the meaning right in front of your face.

            There is no doubt that弟子规 is a well thought out text. Every single line is in the text for a reason, and every single line is important in becoming a good person. There are so many rules simply because there is a lot to being a good person. Most of the rules are similar to those in America, but these rules are just concentrated in one text instead of parsed out over many. That is, in reality, the key difference between弟子规 and other texts. And because弟子规 has stood the test of time far better than other texts, there is no doubt that it has outstanding quality, as well as the fact that it is successful in what it attempts to do.

American Students' Di Zi Gui (弟子规) appraisal 美国学生的弟子规读后感 #4

Appraisal #4: 弟子规Appraisal
BAA, 9th grader

            Di Zi Gui’s principles can be both practical and impractical depending on their cultural relevance.

            Di Zi Gui has many useful teaching, which all people can learn from. Most of Di Zi Gui’s principals in his chapters called 入则孝 and 出则弟 are applicable to American culture, because both Western and Eastern cultures stress obedience to parents and elders. For example, Confucius’ idea about not being lazy, or “父母呼，应勿缓” is very practical because it stresses the importance of listening to your parents. Furthermore, both American and Chinese parents are proud when they see their child interacting with others in a respectful way. Therefore Confucius’ idea of “兄道友，弟道恭” is widely accepted in both American and Chinese culture. In addition, most routing practices, like how to get dressed and washing hands, are deemed practical

 because both American and Chinese cultures believe hygiene and social etiquette are important. Confucius’ teachings about tieing one’s shoes, “袜与履，俱紧切，” washing your hands after using the bathroom, “便溺回，辄净手,” as well as washing your face in the morning, “晨必盥，兼漱口“ are all useful because they regard personal hygiene and looking presentable in society.

            Di Zi Gui also has impractical teachings because he he takes certain ideas further than American culture would deem necessary. Confucius’ ideas about loving your parents even though they might hit you, “号泣随，挞无怨" or hate you, “ 亲增我 ，孝方贤” would be considered unfathomable in America. Although most American parents teach their children to forgive and move on, striking a child is a punishable crime. Moreover, Confucius does not believe in change as much as most American parents do. Although American parents do not encourage their children to change their careers and living situations often, they would not be opposed to it. However Confucius believes “居有常，业无变” or in other words your career and home should be consistent, otherwise your parents will worry.

            Confucius may have developed so many rules for children because children are the generation which can learn from these principles and change their ways to become better people. Older people may be more opposed to change and unwilling to reform their ways. But if younger children grow up learning Confucian teachings they will set a good example for future generations, thus allowing Confucian ideas to stay relevant in society for decades.

            Confucius’ teachings and American values are generally very similar. Both Confucius and Western parents believe in obedience to parent, respect for elders, looking appropriate in society, being trustworthy and prudent, as well as being accepting of others.  However, Confucius takes his ideas to the nth degree.