American Students' Di Zi Gui (弟子规) appraisal 美国学生的弟子规读后感 #3

Appraisal #3:
KMY, 11th grader

            The focus of society on the elders if very different in Chinese and American cultures, and this is seen prominently in弟子规. Although in America we do respect our elders, we focus more on the importance of youth. Our focus on youth causes us to occasionally disregard the actions of our elders. On the other hand, respecting elders is a main component of Chinese culture. Although much of western culture is “youth-centric”, from弟子规we are reminded to respect our elders in the most simple to the most extreme ways.

            Although the degree in which elders are respected differs, both societies still do show elders respect. In both America and China, it is expected that younger people are polite to older people, especially if said older person is in your family, it is expected that children will listen to and respect the things their parents and their teachers say and put forth. These, and many more, similarities are present, but in America, although being respectful is expected of the young, they often don’t uphold their responsibilities in terms of this, while in China the responsibilities of respecting one’s elders are upheld.

In American society, although we respect our elders to an extent, simple but respectful actions occasionally get overlooked. Actions such as responding to your parents as soon as they call, or simply doing things that parents ask of you are among these. Most of us mean well, but, because respecting our elders is not a fundamental aspect of American society, respect of the elders is often a lower priority than personal entertainment.

As opposed to in American society, in Chinese society, elders are extremely respected. In fact, almost everything one does is to either respect, please, or honor their parents. It is not only expected that one does what their parents ask, “父母呼，应勿缓；父母命，行勿懒” but it also important that have a stable home and career so that their parents do not have to worry, “居有常，业无变.” Not only are you expected to respect your parents, you are expected to respect all elders by treating them as you would treat your family, “事诸父，如事父；事诸兄，如事兄.” In China, elders are respected not only because it is part of Chinese culture, but also because it is the right thing to do.

In conclusion, the main difference in actions comes from the different attitudes of the Chinese and the Americans. In “youth-centric” America, one may not feel shame after not showing elders proper mistakes, while in China it would show an inferior character. In China, if you openly disrespect an elder, it is understood that you should be ashamed of yourself, and others should be ashamed of you and for you, while in America, disrespecting an elder in unfortunate, but it doesn’t condemn you as it does in China.